Friday, April 13, 2012

It's not the heat, it's the stupidity.

  Has anyone noticed how the thoughts of personality disordered people are always diametrically opposed to your own? No matter who is talking about what, there will be two schools of thought. Camp logic, where long suffering ACON's reside, and camp disjointed, somewhere out in the La La land of disordered.
 You can say black, and they will say white. Up, is met with down. In, begets an out. Until you realize that ringing sound isn't coming from outside your head.
  Even when it comes to things all about you and none about them. They still have to be heard.  And have the last word. It must reward the "I told you so." region of their brain. They will wait around, and hope your life becomes a ten car pile up, so they can cluck at you like a chicken.
  Even when things go well, they would have surely gone better had you followed their directives.  No matter how unrealistic their advise might have been.
  My mother holds conversations like a dog with a large bone in it's mouth runs at a small hole in the fence. She just keeps ramming things until something gives.
  If she has no facts to shore up her rants, she'll make some up. Her embellishment might be what the rest of us call lies. I would call her a pathological liar, but that would be a disservice to pathological liars. Pathological liars are resourceful, and almost always entertaining.
My mother says any mind numbing lunacy that pops in her head. And her head is a deep well of mind numbing lunacy.
  One day the drain on my mothers air-conditioner was stopped up and water was over flowing into her house.  I was trying to blast the clog out with compressed air, but she kept getting in the way and insisting the clog was in the hose feeding the pan from the condenser... which is ABOVE the pan.
No mom, I am pretty sure it's the DRAIN that is clogged.
Well why don't you try the other one?
No, if the hose ABOVE the pan is clogged, the pan wouldn't be over flowing now would it?
I don't see your point, but you could try blowing air through it just to see if it works.
Mom....unless the water in your house runs UPHILL, I am pretty sure it is the DRAIN.
How do people get like this? I know nothing about air-conditioner's, but if water is backing up, it's a pretty  safe bet the clog is BELOW the elevation of the water.
Was she such a handful growing up that every one indulged her rather than tell her to shut up and sit down?
By the time I got saddled with her, she was all entitled temper tantrums, irrational mood swings, and speaking with authority about things she knows nothing about.
Shad up ya fucking wing nut!
I couldn't take it. Even for seven months. My father was married to her for 23 years, and my step father was married to her for twenty eight. Now I understand why my father did what he did.  He just shot the wrong person.
This isn't some dim wit with a heart of gold. She's as mean as a snake.
Let her get a guy off to one side and she's on him like a duck on a June bug. Doesn't matter who. Or if it is a friend's husband. Or neighbor. Or best friend of her husband.
I used to go grocery shopping with her and she played this "game" to see if we could get through the check stand with out being charged for the sack of potato's under the cart. I think that's called shop lifting.
Her whole day is an exercise in pushing people until someone pushes back. Then flying into a rage until people let her have her way just to shut her up. I hated to be out with her. You could count on  her to cause a scene somewhere before you make it back home.
  What's scary is most PD's are just like her. The really fucked in the head ones.
  She will lie to someone about their own actions.
   Mom, I am pretty goddamn sure, that this sales clerk knows you are lying, because, you are lying to him, about him, and he is the only person standing here except me, and I am trying to find somewhere to hide and watch his face, until I see that moment he realize's he should have let this one go. I would feel sorry for her latest target. But not too much knowing it was better thee than me.
It was like two mirrors facing one another.
He knows you know, that he knows, that you know you are lying, and he knows you know, that he knows that you know, that he knows that you know..................................................................
That he knows you know.
Oy Vey!
I just want my compressor back.


Adela Alba said...

Ahaha, my NM does that my father when they are fixing things. Sometimes she is right, but sometimes she is not. Often my father finds it easier to just do it her way, even though he knows the right way, just to show her she is wrong and shut her up.

What I just love (hate) though is when she thinks she knows more about something in my field than I do. Of course since we talk so much less now, it's not really an issue any more!

Anonymous said...

Does it blow hot air?!!

I'd sacrifice my various tools any day (and have) as the price I "paid" for my " Oh, TW, can you fix THIS? Oh, and as long as you're here, this, this and that as well." These weren't "requests" despite the syntax. They were more like, "You WILL do this..." And they're stuck to you as you go about your "duties" like a damn ankle-biting dawg when they're not yapping some insane "directions" in your ear. Even when you escort them to the Living Room/BR/outside and politely say "Sit and Stay," turn your back and they're climbing it. Mine could WELL afford to pay for any repairs but it was so much more entertaining to tell me what to do and HOW to do it. At one point I handed her an articulating wrench and said, "OK. Here ya go. You do it to your satisfaction" in a VERY neutral tone. Cue rage and a quick duck on my part. (Yeah, no where near as pricy as a compressor but still the price of sanity prior to NC can't be measured in $$.)

Back atcha, bytch.

As an aside, how'd your SF last 28 yrs.? Or did she off him as well?

Lisa said...

"Has anyone noticed how the thoughts of personality disordered people are always diametrically opposed to your own?"

Lisa said...

Oh yeah, my mom was like that too when my dad was fixing things. She'd just say things and throw out situation B type scenarios just to be annoying. She just said whatever shit came to her head and thought it was right and if it turned out that she was even slightly right and you were slightly wrong, HAH, gotcha! I guess that's one strategy. Throw shit out there until one thing hits a target, than congratulate yourself on your victory and tell everyone no thanks, they were all holding you back, when you get to the podium, suckers.

q1605 said...

I am checking my magic 8 ball for Adela.
Seam Seam ala beam.
The spirits are about to speak.
I see no contact in the future for you.
TW. As far as I can tell the step was dead from the neck up.
Nice enough guy. Just not so sharp.
But that's a good thing for life with the barbarian.
If she offed him there was no evidence. She told my sister she thought of taking a bat to his head. After his Alzheimer's really kicked in.
I am not making this up.
I know you must think I stretch things.
Other than her every one in my family was pretty damn decent.
I guess she didn't like the numbers and wanted a downward departure.

q1605 said...

Lisa. I am meaning more than being difficult. Which they are.
It's like they wait for you to talk about something, and then take the exact opposite stance.
If you like restaurant A, they will tell you how bad they think it sucks.
Later if you say that restaurant A really sucks, they will tell you it's not do bad.

Anonymous said...

This is hilarious and not intended to make fun of your situation with the Barbarian. The parallels are incredible - Aunt Marge sounds exactly like the Barbarian. And it actually took place in East Texas.

You know, believe it or not, from everything I've read I can actually sympathize with your situation. In spite of the crazy attacks on me. I have my own Barbarian, a sick, narc abusing brother. Whether you believe it or not.

I really don't subscribe to wishing anything bad on anyone especially someone I don't know BUT maybe, with any luck, the Barbarian will find her Bernie!

Lisa said...

Yeah I know...I said to my dad once that they were being abusive. He said that I was parent abusing them.

q1605 said...

That was the greatest article I have ever seen. It's like a parallel universe of mine. It captures the surreal affect of having this stuff go on around you, and how at the same time it is what it is. With me being a kid as it happened, it's all I know..
I am from (North East Texas) Dallas. That's where all of my story happened.

Man feel free to make fun of what you want. I try to put a more serious veneer on posts lest people think I am as twisted as the Barbarian. My sister and I laugh like hyena's now some 40 years later. We were kids then and yet we seemed to be the only ones who understood how wrong and fucked up it all was.
I have never been able to come close to a way to describe what it is like to come from that. This analogy might be as close as I can get to a description.
Last night I saw a pair of identical twins. I mean carbon copies. I was thinking how BIZARRE that must be. Having this person around that looks like you, sounds like you, and in a lot of ways, kind of thinks like you. And to top it off parents always have to come up with cutsey sound alike names, and dress them alike et. al.
I thought that it would get me so freaked out I might want to push my sibling in front of a bus.
But you could see them interacting with each other, and with the people around them. They were out going and you could tell they doted on each other. They seemed to be incredibly well adjusted.
And I thought, of course they are. They know nothing else. From the time they hit the ground until now, they know nothing else but having this doppelganger staring them in the face all day every day.
It's the same only different. As far as having had a life that is hard for others to conceive.
The bulk of my life came after all that, and it is all I know. It's always been a part of who I am and what I carry around with me.
I know how odd it sounds to others. I am not that disconnected from it. I know how wrong it all was.
I watch investigation discovery channel with their true crime shows. I rarely compare the story on TV with mine. Unless something jogs a memory and then I will say.
Jaysus. I don't know why I am gobsmacked by any of this show. Look at what all my mother did.

Sweetness said...

OMG. They just love to make it look like you're stupid. They know everything, and you're blessed that they've allowed you in their company.

I laughed out loud when reading how you described what happened to your father. Dark humor--a necessity when you've been through what ACONs have endured. Or perhaps I'm a bit deranged.

vicariousrising said...

I'm laughing my ass off on this one. Especially when you wrote about them saying it's "black" after you say "white" because my parents told me I did this TO THEM all the time. And me, being the good little idiot would ask myself why I was being such a brat and unable to agree with them. What a mindfuck.

Besides, once I really thought about their using this as "proof" that I was a troubled, contrary child, I realized that if I were going to debate them over whether something was black or white, my answer would have been "gray".