Friday, June 15, 2012

I am a mark, I am an island.



In the winding down of the seven months I cared for my mother, she started calling me a mark.
As in the kind of guy a grifter seeks out as easy pickings.
This was her way of assigning some bouffant, Tammy Wynette, cracker ass parking lot cred to herself, while dismissing the genuine hard knocks I took full on when she abandoned me after my fathers death.
The two reasons I was relegated to the mark zone:
#1) I was on a greyhound bus and gave a guy that just got out of prison enough money to buy himself lunch on his trip between prison and a halfway house in Austin.
#2 )  I gave a guy that lived down the street from her a ride to the bus station. The son of one of her neighbors. He was bouncing around on the couch's of friend's and family and to her that equaled being homeless. .
The only strike against these guys were that they are black.
And she is as racist as the Grand Wizard.
This is a perfect example of a malignant narcissist having a fit about things that are of no consequence and using their objections about a non event as a toe hold to fuck up the rest of the day.
This was really the first letter I sent to her. After I went no contact.
I might have mixed up her address with those of her neighbors and sent them copies of this too.
It's all a blur to me now.
My mind is shot.
Ask her. She'll tell you.
She will tell you that my memory is tainted by all the times I huffed the Mary Jane.
So really I am hardly legally responsible for this post or any other post or letter no matter who they were unintentionally written by and no matter who they were accidentally sent to and who might have accidentally sent them even if in actuality they were in reality actually sent or written as opposed to me having the illusion of sending them whilst I was in a hallucinatory state.


14 comments:

vicariousrising said...

Your disclaimer cracked me up.

What struck me reading the letter was this image I got of your mother reading it and smiling with pride about her audacity and that she was so slick to get away with it.

Kind of makes me want to vomit.

Anonymous said...

She's nuts, that's about the gist of it. I give money all the time to strangers and people who look down on their luck. I remember one time I went to get some take out food and gave a homeless guy the food I'd just bought and the change from the $20. I'd rather give to people who might be conning me for spare change, than to ignore someone who is desperate for help. In other words, I'd rather be a mark than an asshole, lol

Sis

Adela Alba said...

Wow! All that bloodshed and work for the money and she left it in the car!? WOW.

q1605 said...

Sis. I told her the story and in her mind he was just some random guy shaking me down for spare change. This guy hadn't been out for two hours. His clothes were in about the only thing the state gives you for your time besides the bus ticket. It's a little white mesh duffle bag.
He was commenting on how the money had changed with the added security measures. In fact it was I that struck up a conversation with him. I don't know who is he was with on the inside but they weren't cracker friendly. He couldn't report to the house until after 5 and he didn't have a dime on him. So I gave a ten I had. Only then did he start acting friendly. I don't care what, people need to eat. The state feeds you well on the inside but transitions like this will leave a guy walking around hungry.
Adela. They knew he had a roll of cash. They got about $1600 from his pockets. I don't know if they were aware of the ten K in the trunk.
The cops found it later.
Doesn't matter.
Her calling me a mark was more of that pecking away bull shit that lets her take you out at the knees and keeps you from remembering all the bat shit crazy things she has done.

Jonsi said...

"I might have mixed up her address with those of her neighbors and sent them copies of this too."

Bah! HAHAHAHAHA! I love that. I'm going to store that one away for future reference.

Sweetness said...

Damn. Your mother makes mine look like Mary Poppins.

Anonymous said...

That's true, scapegoating everyone else means she takes a free ride on all her shit. I think that's the motive of always pointing the finger at other people. It's not just that she gets to talk about everybody else and prop up her ego, it's that it diverts attention like a slight of hand magic act.

Sis

q1605 said...

It's her forte'. I would come to in the middle of one of her infamous rages and realize I was being dressed down by a person that was capable of anything.
I wasn't the same person I was the last time we lived together. And I just don't take well to unfounded criticism from a crazy person.
She masked this as concern for me. She said that mark that I was, I was going to be-friend the wrong person and end up knocked it the head and killed. (Which is exactly what she did when she wanted what the money that dude had)
Where was this concern over the past 35 years?
I did all right alone for decades. Why am I suddenly in peril now that I was living with and caring for her.

q1605 said...

Jonsi. I thought we were playing a fun game. She liked to tell every one I know the smallest details of every bad thing I ever did (and embellish the shit out of it) so I just took my turn and made sure all the people in her cozy new life knew all about her old one.
Sweetness. My mom is much like Mary Poppins. Armed with an Uzi and having an acid flash back.

Anonymous said...

"She said that mark that I was, I was going to be-friend the wrong person and end up knocked it the head and killed".

She's totally projecting, she thinks everyone else is like her, planning murders and robbing people and looking for the next person to use. Normal people don't think like that.

Sis

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q1605 said...

The barbarian din't believe in catch and release.

Anonymous said...

When you see all the stuff she's done in black in white laid out, it's amazing anyone ever had anything to do with her.


Sis

q1605 said...

I was also just thinking how contrary it was of her to....on one hand do whatever it took to keep some guy on the hook so she could have a roof over her head etc.
Like be waiting with a hot meal at the end of the day. Put out like a gum machine.
I know that's the only reason she let her self get knocked up.
But on the other hand, do the craziest stuff to make the guy miserable.