Personality disordered people love to trade queens.
Trading queen's is a chess reference. Each person having their queen in check by their opponents queen is like the mutually assured destruction that kept the US and USSR from annihilating each other for decades.
I use this to describe social interactions with others that make me feel safe enough to open up more than what would ordinarily make me comfortable.
As long as people think rationally.
It starts with the other person (my mother) telling me something personal.
Which leads me to tell her something personal.
And then having my candor thrown right back in my face.
Knowing now that every word out of this person's mouth is a lie. There was no trading of queen's. I just handed her my piece.
She lured me into the open, clubbed me like a baby seal, and acquired yet another missile in her arsenal to blast me with forever more.
One can never under estimate the chutzpah of politicians, men of the cloth, and the personality disordered.
There is no shortage of closet bound politician's working like beavers to destroy the rights of gays.
No lack of fornication condemning preachers, wallowing in whore house's.
And you have my mothers involvement in a murder.
You might think that a person who lured a man over to her house and killed him wouldn't have a lot to say about much of anything anyone else has done.
Things that pale in comparison.
That killing a man and stuffing him in his trunk for some unsuspecting slob to find later, would give this woman a sense of shame. Or at least reservation when judging others.
To that I would say this.
She is and was the absolute most unforgiving, shit stirring, bitch on wheels I have yet to see.
It sucks that any serious conversation with a sociopath NPD has to be approached like peace negotiations. That no matter how much knowledge you have of a person's reprehensible actions, they will take it to the mat each and every time you engage.
Why should you need leverage? Why shouldn't a person be able to say what is on their mind?
Especially if what is on your mind is, "I don't like you following me around the house and badgering me for hours at a time. Knock it off."
And not having things pitched up to the next level.
Which is exactly what happens.
Oh you haven't seen badgering yet mofo!
Jeez why am I bothering.
Those that forget history are doomed to repeat it.
This is a quote from FDR before he met with Stalin at Yalta.
I just have a hunch that Stalin is not that kind of a man. ... and I think that if I give him everything I possibly can and ask for nothing from him in return, noblesse oblige, he won't try to annex anything and will work with me for a world of democracy and peace.
If your narcissist is the regular kind of narcissist.
That is they come with a head as hard as a Bois d'arc Stump.
Just give it up and develop an exit strategy.
You'll never win.
Go no contact.
If my mother denies committing a murder in which I was scheduled to testify at trial, what hope do you guys have?