Friday, May 2, 2014

From Kathy Krajco: What Makes Narcissists Tick

One of the most glaring outward signs of malignant narcissism is the way narcissists malign others. They are constantly improving their own image at someone else's expense.

Another very red flag is perverted reactions to things. This red flag can't be missed, because it's downright shocking. But you witness it infrequently, and it's so perplexing that people unfailingly disbelieve their very eyes and blow off this warning sign.

Therefore, whenever you DO witness a perverted reaction to something, DO NOT blow it off. It is always a very bad sign.

For example, the narcissist inexplicably gets angry at what should please. You expected a smile and - WHAM - you got a look that could kill instead. It sets you reeling, doesn't it?

Guess what? That's exactly why the narcissist does that = to set you reeling so you are easy to run over. 

Other examples are being repulsed by what should endear. Laughing at what is tragic.

You know - those bizarre reactions that make you want to pinch yourself. Those reactions that you cannot quite believe even though you have seen them with your own eyes.

Remember that normal people don't do that.

My experience convinces me that narcissists use these backwards reactions to things as shock tactics. They strike you as the sight of apple falling UP from a tree would. It takes you aback. It disarms you.

That way the narcissist gets away with it, because you are stunned. It's kinda like a "sucker punch".

While your jaw is hanging and you are wondering where that reaction came from - whether you or the narcissist is the crazy one - the narcissist performs this hit-and-run to get away with the abuse.

It's a way to disable you (by morally stunning you) so that you cannot defend yourself from the attack. The term for disabling and then attacking someone is "mayhem." Needless to say, it's the lowest of the low who fight that way.

Know anybody who does that you? Who somehow takes offense and gets mad just when you are saying or doing something that should make them happy? If you do know anyone like this, stay away from them. It's a stunt. A perverted stunt to catch you off guard and run you over.

And normal people, people of goodwill, don't do that.


Pandora Viltis said...

Kathy was so insightful. It upsets me thinking about how she might've died.

mulderfan said...

Know someone? Yeah. I called him "dad".

As a kid, it was like living in a field of landmines.

q1605 said...

Yeah PV I hate using her stuff instead of writing my own. But as she lives on as long as she is not forgotten.

q1605 said...

Yea MF Remember that Movie "Full Metal Jacket"? There is this bully type guy that gets into with the Matthew Modine character, They defend him by saying how useful he is in a firefight. Just he is going to need someone to follow him around for the rest of his life throwing hand grenades at him. Your comment makes me think of that.

Lisette said...

Ass backward reactions is right. Both of my N parents reacted with cruelty and revulsion when I acted with love and kindness toward them. I used to think it was because my ability to loved showed up their deficiencies. Now I know they were engaging in a fight that I had no idea I was in.

"It's only the lowest of the low who fight that way."

The narcissists never stop fighting and they have no rock bottom.

q1605 said...

You win an undeclared war.